Belinda from Tinder

Belinda from Tinder

Words and Music By Wayne James 2015

(Punk riff, full on quirk to smirk and beyond..)

1234!..

(— intro 4 bars—C /add G bass alternate)

Belinda  from Tinder

Looked out the winda

Thinking ‘bout a fella 

She had swiped last night

He texted he’d collected 

The Star Wars cast; “perfected” 

A PHD in coding 

And he's always right

Belinda wants “an honest man, 

With flowing hair, all over tan

A love of fresh oysters 

And a good appetite” 

Covering his bald patch

Thought she was a good catch

So the Coder and Belinda

Scored a date for that night

They met at his apartment

And to his room they both went

To scan his figurines 

Posed with military intent

Chewbacca was a giant dog

And Yoda sat upon a log

Han Solo struck priapic pose

But then the Coder’s ego froze

She tapped upon his laptop

Danced a little hip hop

He flushed and made excuses 

The Blaster needs a gun prop

Belinda from Tinder 

looked out the winda

Waiting for the coder

To come back upright

(— 16 bars, bass and piano, strum——)

30 later courage found

Marching in.. wired to the ground

Sensed her chin held hints of stubble

Scrolling down ran into trouble

He cursored over hidden pointer

Paused a mo’ to reconnoitre.

Chilled to the bone in carbonite

Froze in horror at the sight

Belinda from Tinder 

Looked out the winda

Waiting for the coder

To see the light

“I’m Bob” she said to crumpled coder,

With James Earl’s tone, that classy smoulder

“You're a man!” The coder cried,

“Your download caught me by surprise!”

“Your profile didn't show this fact.”

“I’m bits of both” Belinda rapped,

“You're profile says you have a tan,

But all I see is Jabba spam!”

“Go now In-Vader

Out of my sight.”

“Mmmmmmm”, she mused

“Solo tonight?”

(-riff 12bars-)

Belinda from Tinder 

Looked out the winda

Thinking ‘bout the coder 

She had crashed last night.